Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Daily Awesome

image from, apropos of nothing

I was on the phone with a friend earlier today, and it came to light that much of the joy I derive in life comes at the expense of others. Like, when I think of things that would really make me happy, it usually involves someone else becoming quite unhappy at that exact moment. For example, my wish today was for my friend's new business venture to annihilate the business of someone I don't like. That kind of shit. If something goes wrong (for someone else), I generally find it amusing, and then hide behind the guise of I'm laughing with you, not at you. Like, OMG, I am so sorry that you just tripped and fell ass over head over your baby's jogging stroller while passing me on the trail. So sorry, in fact, that my laughter is just an awkward attempt to help you heal from the humiliation.

That concept, coupled with the fact that my life seems to be made up of a continuous string of tragic yet random events led to the thought... I wonder if other people are getting a kick out of my misery? And the answer, after a scientific survey of asking three people how funny they thought it was when I went to work yesterday without my equipment**, was yes, indeed, people do enjoy my sorrow.

So in order to spread love and bring peace to the land, I decided to start the Daily Awesome, wherein *awesome* = OMG WTF seriously? did that just happen? dripping in sarcasm.

I was going to make it a blog feature, but then decided to make it a Facebook page, that way, when something awesome happens to you, you can share it with the world too. Because nothing helps one feel better about their current suckage than to have others point and laugh at it.

You're welcome.

So go to Facebook and join the Daily Awesome. Right now. And if you're not on Facebook, then go join Facebook. You too can be awesome.

**I am a court reporter, and yesterday I went to a deposition without a steno machine, or laptop, or anything. If you're not familiar with this industry, the best example I could give would be imagine you get your entire family together for family portraits, the kids are dressed up and clean and everyone's hair looks good. And the photographer shows up and says, Crap, I forgot my camera. And that photographer has no camera, or back up camera, or even so much as a camera on his cell phone. That's what I did yesterday. But to lawyers instead of your family. Awesome.


sam said...

Shana, you DID NOT! I'm laughing my @ss off right now at the thought. I have heard from more than one reporter that doing that is their most frightening nightmare - like the rest of us mere mortals and our recurring nightmare that we show up at high school with no clothes on - and now you have survived that nightmare. Do you know what this means? You have nothing - NOTHING - to be afraid of for the rest of your life! You have survived a worst-nightmare scenario. I bow down to you.

OneTiredEma said...

I think either you need more vacation or less booze.

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!® said...

Now I know why Kate and I keep marrying you over and over again.

I am WAY behind in blog reading and posting *AHEM* and what is the one blog post I read this morning? Why it is a blog post written by someone I cannot stand, and in her most recent post she wrote something so offensive that I can't imagine why God doesn't reach down from the clouds and smite this bitch on the back of her really bad hairdo. But what will happen is 3, 6, or 10 people will leave her a Vanilla-flavored comment that basically ignores what an a-hole she is, and what I won't do is leave her a comment telling her what an a-hole she is because I don't want that a-hole to have the satisfaction of knowing that I read her mealy-worm infested post. (My apologies to all the nice mealy worms out there.) Also, I don't want other people to know I'm this snarky. My point? And I do have one. My point is that your Daily Awesome theory was proven right here. I read two posts today. One that was an offensive piece of shit written by an a-hole, and one that was Awesome.

Whew. I'm exhausted. See why I don't blog anymore?

Cat said...

Shana-if I were a court reporter, I have no doubt I would do the same thing.

Cheri-who?who?I need to know so I too can hate her.

stephanie (bad mom) said...

Shana, you are so brilliant it hurts sometimes. And makes me bitterly jealous but I still <3 you.

And I think I know who Cheri is talking about and I'm going to go read her right now so my day can only improve...

Fantastic Forrest said...

As great and funny a writer as you are, nothing compares to the awesomeness of actually being with you. So thanks to Stephanie for introducing us, and thanks to you for making time in your awesome life for happy hour hanging out and garage sale madness. XO

And now I'm off to look at the source of Cheri's ire as well.

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!® said...

It's just someone who has the tendency to be judgmental anyway. I just find it particularly offensive when judgments are made by someone who hasn't walked in the shoes of the person being judged and are about people who for whatever reason may not be able to speak up for themselves.