Saturday, July 23, 2011

I can't look

I don't consider myself to be tenderhearted, overly sensitive, or even particularly empathetic. In short, I'm no delicate flower.

And yet I find myself unable to cope with distant tragedy. I can't watch news coverage of the events in Oslo. I can't read news stories about it. If I do, I won't be able to leave the house. I won't be able to focus on the things that I need to do in my own life. Yes, it's all about me. Fuck off, it's my blog.

This is not a new development. Columbine, 9/11, Oklahoma City, Afghanistan, Darfur, countless other atrocities that human beings have inflicted on each other. They shut me down. Shut. Me. The. Fuck. Down. I cannot deal.

God forbid I ever have to deal with personal tragedy. I don't have inner strength. I don't have reserves to draw upon. I marvel at people who overcome, rise above, move on after unspeakable events. They are super heroes, the people who carry on, exhibit grace and strength and perseverance.

I'm going to go bury my head in the sand now. Don't judge.

5 comments:

Maggie May said...

not judging, totally get it.

Createliveblog said...

That happens to me occasionally and I am always perplexed by how deeply we feel for people we don't even know... Hey, you're just extremely empathetic and kind-hearted! That makes us sensitive spirits :)

-Carly @ Createliveblog

Keetha said...

I'm the same way, big time. I feel like such a big baby sometimes but I can't help it!

Marquita Herald said...

For me it's the TV ads to donate to humane society/aspca - a glimpse of those poor dog/cat faces sends me over the edge so I rush to switch the channel - and hate myself for it every time.

viagra online said...

It is similar in my case, I just cant go to funerals or hospitals, I just cant handle others people suffering.