Showing posts with label family fun. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family fun. Show all posts

Monday, January 3, 2011

In which I apparently smoke crack...

Taking a break from my lazy blogging series (but don't worry, shit I bought is coming soon!) to let you know that I have apparently lost touch with reality, because I thought this looked like a good idea.
That is a 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle. OF BEADS. For real. Also? My 12-year-old child? Has never done a jigsaw puzzle. Lazy mother, who?

We got the pieces laid out on the dining room table...

And started assembling on the card table.

And within about, oh, let's say seven minutes, Carlie was bored.

To which I say, BORED MY ASS. We will complete this puzzle if it's the last thing we do. Come hell or high water, through blood shed and tears... VICTORY WILL BE MINE.

PS: I have apparently lost my fucking mind. Wheeeeee!

UPDATE: I am going to post a picture of our progress every day. Wherein "every day" = until someone dies because of this f*ing puzzle. I've even created a separate page for tracking puzzle progress here, in the tabs above.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

UPDATE: Summer Snapshots

The summer fun continues on. I was going to add these to this post, but, meh, lazy, who?

I had to work yesterday. On a Saturday. In downtown Portland, at a real office with other people. When I got home, we went out for sushi. Conveyor belt sushi. Yum + Fun = Yay!


Sushi Tsunami photos borrowed from Yelp

Following dinner, we decided to hit the Golf-a-rama. For those not local, that's really the name of the putt-putt place.

Tim, exhibiting Tiger-like form.

Carlie, concentrating on making the hole.

Me (and Carlie's finger) mugging for the camera. I swear, I had a really cute top on under my grammy sweater. But, hello, it was 70-some-odd degrees on this summer night of fun.
What? You don't golf in heels?

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Summer Snapshots

Kind of like Wordless Wednesday, except it's not Wednesday. And I've got words. But, you know what I mean. Alternate title: shit I did this week that was photoworthy. This would not include the unphotoworthy stuff, like a $800 dental visit. Oy.

This week we had an unexpected week of vacation, wherein vacation = three days worth of jobs cancelled and, boo-yah, hanging at home, until the next paycheck comes and the boo-yah becomes boo-hoo.

In any event, there was some grilling...
And some swimming. And yes, that's my thumb. Shut up. But seriously, note the perfect herky form of Carlie's jump. She inherited the cheer gene. And yeah, again, shut up.
Visiting the river with a friend...
Blackberry picking...
And eating blackberry shortcake. On the deck. Can you see the river? It's in the far right corner. It's not as far away as it looks.
So, how's your summer coming along?

PS: Contrary to the photographic evidence, my husband is not a serial killer. I swear.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

How momma rolls

Pool observation room to myself, feet up, book to read and some vending machine love.

How to party like a 10 year old

1. Call up your two best friends for a 2-day sleepover.

2. Have lunch at a skeezy Chinese buffet that you lurve that your parents refuse to go to unless it is, like, your birthday.

3. Go swimming and have the entire ginormous pool to yourselves.

4. After swimming, go to a movie (Bedtime Stories).

5. Give each other manicures.

6. Have Doritos for dinner.

7. Play boardgames until midnight.

8. Have donuts for breakfast.

9. Make chocolate covered, candy dipped pretzels for party favors.

10. That's how we do.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Happy Boxing Day

My favorite Christmas '08 photos.

Our Angel... not always a happy angel (read post below)
Our yard in the snow
The girls built a snowman. It took forever. Seriously.
Our house in the snow. Taken after the first snow had fallen. I didn't get pictures after the "real" snow came down days later and completely obliterated the front steps.
Christmas morning... everyone in a hat I knit for them.

Christmas is over... now what?
I stepped on the scale this morning (fool am I) and have gained four pounds over the course of the last two days. So today's Boxing Day festivities will include a trip to the gym at some point, because the roads are still too snowy and icy to run (for me, anyway).

We had a slippery, slidy, kind of scary drive into Portland yesterday to have dinner with family, but it was worth every scary moment on the freeway because we had a wonderful time. Then we slipped and slid our whole way home as well, with a side trip to drop Erinna off at her mom's house in the opposite direction of escaping the bad roads and into the worst of it that we've been in yet. Tim, ever the good Samaritan, helped a couple that were stuck in the snow while Carlie and I napped in the car. And by napped in the car, I mean I tried to sleep while she asked me questions from Quiz Fest magazine to determine who my "Twilight twin" is.

Oh. Speaking of Carlie. My prediction from Christmas Day, before we went to church, when I jokingly wrote I could just imagine her being the only choir kid to show up in costume? Yeah. That totally happened. She was not a happy angel. And we got there late, so we arrived to the choir kids, all in their black and white choir outfits, on the risers on the alter at church, already singing, and my girl in full on angel-wear, complete with silver wings and halo, joined them, right smack in the middle of the top riser, where people had to scooch over to accommodate her wing span. It was classic.

My camera battery was dead (of course), but luckily I had Carlie's new Flip Video camera in my purse, so I captured it on video. Which Carlie then accidentally deleted while watching it (of course).

I'm soon to be headed off to the running store for new shoes and warm cozy running wear... which are totally essential for me getting into and out of the car to drive to the gym on a cold day, because I am so not running outside in the foreseeable future. 

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Urban Adventures

Today we are going to get one of these...

No, not another supermodel for the household, but a Christmas tree. Our "family tradition" for several years was -- and I am not making this up -- to hike three blocks up Main Street to "City Liquidators" and buy a $15 douglas fir from their parking lot and carry it home. Great fun! But last year we accidentally discovered the Chelatchie Prairie Railroad and since we are going for a second year in a row, I guess that makes it our new family tradition. Which is much better and family-fun-ish than hauling home a half-dead ghetto ass tree from the City Liquidator store. Trust me on that one.
We're going here...
On this...

We'll be riding the restored antique steam engine from Yacolt to Lucia, with a stop at Moulton Falls, where we'll have a meet and greet with Santa, some hot cocoa and cookies, and select our Christmas tree.
It's cold out, but the sun is shining, and everyone is hopped up about the adventure. After yesterday's adventure as a chaperone on the LONGEST EFFING FIELD TRIP OF ALL TIME to the Festival of Trees, I am thinking things can only get better for me this time around.
Just FYI, yesterday's field trip included:
1. driving my car full of middle school girls (plus my nine year old) (and PS-middle school girls talk, a lot, all the time, without ever stopping, and especialy about Twilight)
2. hauling a cart of band equipment through the bowels of the Oregon Convention Center with the help of an 8th grade boy
3. being locked out on the loading dock of the Oregon Convention Center (by and with my 8th grade compaion) and then
4. hiking 128 miles around the outside of the freaking Oregon Convention Center, with said 8th grader, to get back in.
5. Oh, and then leaving Portland at 4:30'ish pm, JUST IN TIME FOR HELLACIOUS TRAFFIC, so it took 45 minutes to travel the less than 10 miles back to the school, with the car full of now rummy and hungry middle school girls, plus my fourth grader, who was now late for a sleepover and God help us all it was an IMPORTANT sleepover.
So, yeah, a train ride "THROUGH THE HISTORIC LOGGING COUNTRY OF BEAUTIFUL NORTH CLARK COUNTY, WASHINGTON. FROM YACOLT TO LUCIA STOPPING AT MOULTON FALLS PARK" which includes "A TRIP THROUGH A 330 FOOT LONG TUNNEL, A TRESTLE CROSSING THE LEWIS RIVER AND A HALF HOUR LAYOVER AT MOULTON FALLS" should definitely help erase the emotional scars inflicted by yesterday's Festival of Trees.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

When will they start listening to me?

Have you ever asked your kid eleventy million times if they need to use the bathroom before you leave Quiznos to go hiking? And they say no, no, no? And as soon as you leave, and park, and hike for half an hour to a place with no bathrooms, that kid has to pee? And then you realize that this kid, this girl kid, has never peed outside before and much drama ensues? And the whole wonderful day of exploring nature turns into a big screaming MY PANTS ARE WET TAKE ME HOME nightmare that makes you laugh a maniacal cackling laugh, which in turn makes your kid CRY EVEN MORE, but you can't stop because oh my god you are going insane? Just hypothetically asking, of course.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Sunset on the Columbia River




hiking and biking today

She was biking, we were hiking, hence the no helmets on the grownups. If we were all biking, we would totally have had our helmets on.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Last Day of Summer

Spent today running about, getting last minute school supplies for the kiddos who start school in the morning. How very exciting!

My son, however, does not start until September 29, I think, or maybe 28th? Not sure. He's in college and needs to keep track of that himself. He is 19, having a birthday in October when he'll be 20 (duh!) and since my sister is here visiting now and not in October, she wanted to buy him a birthday gift before she heads back to Little (God Forsaken) Rock. (She doesn't love it there.)

So Taylor, the boy, has decided he is going to do some long distance backpacking. When? Where? With whom? These are all TBA issues apparently. But he's been hanging out on survivalist web sites getting all kinds of GREAT ideas for building his own gear, like how to make a camp stove out of a coffee can and two wire hangers.
So she asks him if he'd like a nice sleeping bag, or a light-weight tent, or a new pack to carry his gear in for his birthday. Nope, he's going to MAKE his own sleeping bag, and tent and backpack. Well, all righty, then. What do you want for your birthday? He settled upon a trip to the fabric department at Walmart to purchase nylon webbing and polyester fabric to make himself a hammock. (The fabric, as my sister eloquently described it, is the same fabric used to make McD's uniforms in the Seventies. Cozy!) His other choice of gift was going to be a bongo drum (anyone else hearing the refrain from Peter Pan's "I don't wanna grow up" right now?)

So, to celebrate the last day of summer vacation, here's a picture of a boy in his homemade hammock, who is outside sleeping is said homemade hammock right now, trying to hang on to the lazy days of summer for at least one more night; maybe trying to hold on to the lazy days of childhood a little bit, too.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

The Day I Did Everything On My List, including getting into a fight with the Goodwill Mean Man

I never thought I would live to see the day, but here I sit, the proud owner of a "to do" list with every item checked off. Laundry? Check! Mop floors again? Check! Buy food? Check! You get the jist.

Started my day with Boot Camp, followed by a weigh-in (don't ask) and then an hour of school uniform duty (which is Our Lady of Lourdes for those who asked "what school uses uniforms?") After uniform duty I picked up Carlie and we went to Winco. I detest Winco. Winco is icky. But in our household, we have very clearly divided finances (we've only been married for 10-1/2 years, people, give me time!) and we have clearly divided financial duties. Buying groceries falls on my list of financial duties except, ooops, I am out of money at the moment. So Tim agreed to spring for a grocery run, but only if I went to Winco. It was a win-win proposition for him, meeting his desire to be both frugal and sadistic.

We did the Winco run and lived to tell the tale, but still need a New Seasons trip this morning because Winco only sells lamb during holidays, per the butcher. Well, it's Labor Day weekend, I told the butcher. But a holiday at Winco is apparently Easter and Christmas. Oh well, I didn't really want any Winco lamb any way. And I love going to New Seasons. It's another one of my Happy Places. Lamb is for a lamb curry stew I am making in the crockpot today. If it is good, I'll post the recipe.

Carlie had a violin lesson scheduled for 1:45, and on the way there we went back to her school and met her new teacher. It is very exciting when you are nine years old to meet your new teacher! Her school is a very small Catholic school, grades K-8, and when teachers teach there, they never leave, so getting a new teacher is a big deal.

New teacher is very cute, looks like she's about 17 years old, just finished a Master's and is full of energy and spunk and enthusiasm. I have no doubt the OLL fourth grade class will have her beaten down and defeated within three months. But that's a story for another day.

Anyway, we are visiting and, crap, it's time for Carlie's violin lesson. Whoops! Hightail it to the violin teacher's house, only five minutes late -- yay! and we even have the violin with us this time! double yay! -- and her son greets us and tells us that his mom tried to call, can't do the lesson, stuck in Beaverton, sorry. That's OK because (1) I have a carload of groceries and (2) my daughter hates playing the violin and (3) I do have shit to do.

So got home, unloaded groceries, and on to the next adventure. Carlie and I rode our bikes to the library.

We have this little family tradition, Carlie and I. At the beginning of every summer, as soon as summer vacation starts, we hightail it to the library to get her signed up for the Summer Reading Program with high hopes of winning fabulous prizes and reading lots of fab books in the process. We walk out proudly with our heads held high, carrying armloads of books.

And at the end of every summer, just before school starts, we walk back into the library, heads hanging in shame, carrying the armload of unread books that are now two months past due. The beauty of the library system, though, is that it is very forgiving and they never embarrass us when we make this annual walk of shame.

Then we go home and make up a list of "Books I read this summer" for Carlie to take to school next week, because if you read the prescribed number of books for your grade level, you get a free dress pass, and when you wear a uniform to school, believe me, a free dress pass is a big freaking deal.

The post-library remainder of the day was spent housecleaning which involved moving a freaking piano. I thought I had tracked the origin of "the smell" to cat pee residue in a floor vent, so I scrubbed out the floor vents as best I could, remopped the floors, and wiped down the exterior of the piano with vinegar for good measure, because I *think* the cat peed on the floor next to the piano (I know she did, but the rest is conjecture) and that it seeped under the piano, and into the floor vent.

When all the cleaning was said and done, it now smells like cat pee vinagrette, the cat pee and vinegar together. Not a nice smell. My sister was telling me a story that was shared with her by her brother in law, who went to school with a girl named Cat Pee Girl who -- you know where I am going here -- smelled like cat pee. I do not want Carlie to become Cat Pee Girl, but at this point I think we are on the verge of being Cat Pee Family. Actually, I don't even know if the smell is actually cat pee, but that's what we're calling it. Could be a dead skunk in the ductwork for all I know. Yes, it is that bad.

During the clean-a-thon, I made a chicken artichoke alfredo dish and baked a homemade apple. Feel free to bow down and lay laurels at my feet.

All of the housecleaning led to an SUV full of Goodwill donations, which I needed to drop off at Goodwill so I could pick up my sister at the airport at 11 p.m. and actually fit her, her child and her luggage into the car. The good news is there is a manned Goodwill dropoff three blocks from my house. The bad news is, the man who mans it is really, really mean. I love the Goodwill concept and the idea that there is an agency employing those who might not be able to find employment elsewhere because of their disabilities, plus the fact that they will recycle my shit for me. Love that! But this man, he is just mean. He's not physically disabled, but there's obviously something "off" cognitively, but that doesn't stop him from being quite the little bastard.

So I pulled up at 7:55, next to the sign that says 'Open till 8 pm' and he is sitting in a chair. He jumps out of the chair and starts rolling down the back bay door of the truck and is YELLING "Closing up! Closing up! Closing up!"

I stepped out of my vehicle and said "I thought you were open until 8."

He looked at his watch and said, "It's 7:55" and I said, "I know that, and 7:55 is not 8," and started opening the back of my SUV, which was met with more YELLING of the "Closing up!" chant.

I said, "Are you telling me you don't want my stuff?" And he said, "I don't like to take stuff after 7:30." And I said, "Then how about putting up a sign that says "Open til 8 but I don't like taking stuff at 7:30" and he just looked at me and continued to roll the door shut.

I had two garbage bags and a box of stuff, and as he is rolling down the door, which apparently is pretty heavy because it is taking him forever to do it, I start shoving shit under the half closed door. At this point, he becomes distressed and deviates from his "Closing up!" mantra and starts in with "I don't have time to sort this! They don't like me to leave if I haven't sorted everything!" in kind of a panicky way.

At this point, I started to feel bad for upsetting him, because he is a Goodwill employee, which implies some kind of inability to gain employment elsewhere, and no matter how able-bodied he may appear, that's saying something. But I didn't feel bad enough to take the stuff back home with me either, so I just got in my car and hauled ass out of there.

Came home, ate dinner, went to the airport and picked up my sister and her 2 year old.

Miscommunication/misunderstanding totally all my fault led to said 2 year old riding home with no carseat because, oops, auntie is a spaz and didn't bring it.

Got home at 11:45, walked in the door and my sister said, "Smells like cat pee."

Fuck.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

One of My Happy Places, aka the post where she went apeshit with the links

Cinetopia. Even the name makes me feel tingly. I heart Cinetopia in a major way. It gives me a chance to live out all of my snobbery fantasies, because when I go there I feel totally superior to everyone across the country that might be out enjoying a movie at a mere Regal Cinema. When I go to Cinetopia, I am one of the beautiful people and I know in my heart I am where I belong.

Sadly, my husband has the exact same experience, except in a bizarro world completely opposite way, when we go to Kiggins. And we go to Kiggins way more than we go to Cinetopia. Last time we went to Kiggins, the theatre was virtually empty, we sat in the middle, and were joined by two homeless guys who sat THISCLOSE to me and smelled like pee. Not "old pee" but, like, active "I am now peeing myself" pee. I was totally skeeved out. Rubbing elbows with the homeless is part of our daily lives living here in the tres chic downtown 'Couv area, but the smell of fresh urine turns me into a delicate flower who cannot handle the reality of street life and must be sheltered from all things gritty.

Speaking of living in the tres chic downtown area of the 'Couv, our neighborhood last month "put down the city's first street mural." It is on my street, one block down, and is insanely fine. It's been down for a few weeks but I forgot to post a picture. But I digress.


My dear friends at my beloved Cinetopia sent me a coupon today for FREE POPCORN. Who doesn't love FREE POPCORN! Being the ultimate consumer (aka suckah), the allure of FREE POPCORN is more than enough to get me in the door. To make things even better, they're going to be showing RENT, filmed on Broadway during one of the final shows of the 12-year run, and holy hell, who doesn't want to go see RENT in HD in the "living room" theatre where you can have a pitcher of beer or a bottle of wine and tapas and FREE POPCORN all served to you in a cush leather recliner with ottoman. Sign me up!

Being the saavy and wise consumer that I am (bwahhhaaa), I noticed that the offer of FREE POPCORN expires September 4 and RENT is running for four days only September 24, 25, 27 and 28. Damn you, you marketing geniuses, for luring me in not once but twice for the month of September!

So I shall be partaking of the FREE POPCORN sometime in the next nine days, hopefully while my sister is in town because she has never regaled in the splendor that is Cinetopia. Did I mention she is living in Little Rock? I don't think there is any splendor to be found in Little Rock, so I'm sure she could use a dose. I hopefully will also be partaking of the RENT experience at the end of September. Who wants to go see RENT with me? Holla.
**Disclaimer: I am in no way being compensated by Cinetopia (I wish!). I am truly, madly, deeply in love with Cinetopia of my own volition because that's how I roll.

****************************************************************
In un-Cinetopia-related news, I am still sick to my stomach, which is so convenient when I need to childproof my entire freaking house in the next 24 freaking hours, and prepare for the mother of all freaking camping trips in three freaking days and my nine year old still has a freaking cough and low temp. Can you tell I'm FREAKING out?
Oh, and my house still reeks. I put out little bowls of vinegar all over the place two days ago, and now it smells like cat turd and vinegar, a tasty combination. Removed my beautiful shag rug, Febreezed the couch and chair. Still stinks. There is a super cute house for sale about two blocks over that I am trying to convince my husband to go look at. He doesn't think moving to a new house because this house smells bad is a viable option. I say, dude, think outside the box every now and then, come on.
Speaking of Tim, my husband came home from work last night and reported that he had been "verbally aggressive" in a meeting he was in and wanted my help with damage control. WTF? When you are self-employed, and a massive part of your income is generated through being on coalitions and such where you are networking and getting referrals, you really should not attack the GUEST SPEAKER who was invited in to talk to your group, a group that you're happy you were invited to be in in the first place. EVEN I KNOW THAT, and I'm the queen of opening my mouth when I should not.
Jeez.
****************************************************************

UPDATE: OK, I just revisited the link I used for the tres chic downtown area of the 'Couv above and actually read the page content and I've got to say, I'm loving the list of "cons" to living in Vancouver. They are --
>>Cons:
Vancouver is not considered very "hip"
Downtown Vancouver is a ghost town at night
More conservative than Portland
Sales tax
You have to pump your own gas
Hope you like "sprawl!" >>

Sunday, August 24, 2008

You're not sick, you're just tired

We went to a backyard boil tonight. The food was delicious and the company was lovely. I made Sangria (which was yum) and an apple pie (which was yumm-er) and I ate way more than I needed to, but it was all good and a lot of fun. Thanks, Denise, for inviting us : ) EDIT: that should actually say “last night,” but I started to write this when we got home and, um, fell asleep with the laptop on my chest in bed. STEP AWAY FROM THE BLOG, NOW.

Carlie was complaining of a cough when we were on the way there, which sounded kind of like a fake cough, or maybe an “I had a sleepover and didn’t actually sleep and, man, am I tired now” cough.

We kept blowing her off, telling her she was fine, sending her on her way, when she would join the adults and discretely complain to mom and dad about her cough or a headache or runny nose or stomach ache. Eventually she went into the living room to watch Shrek with the other kids and she fell asleep. When it was time to go home, we woke her up (she was sound asleep) and, man, was she hot. Like fever hot. Like “oh crap, she wasn’t faking and I totally blew her off and wow are we horrible parents” hot. The horrible parent discussion was had for the entire 15 minute drive home (while she slept in the car), with Tim feeling a skosh guilty because Carlie wanted to sit in his lap earlier and he told her no. It’s 9 a.m. and she’s still in bed sleeping.

Sadly, this is not the first time that we have been horrible parents in this regard. We have good kids who generally are not fakey kids, but the immediate assumption is ALWAYS that the illness is, if not being faked, is at least being dramatized. This is a form of parental denial more than an accusation against the children. I can't have sick kids, I am barely able to manage with healthy kids. Sick kids is too challenging for me, so I just pretend they're not sick. As a parenting style, it usually works. And has resulted in kids who have learned to very adequately fend for themselves for the most part, so yay for raising independent children!

This is not a good time for having a sick kid, not good at all. Definitely does not work with my schedule right now, sorry, you’re going to have to perk up, kiddo. My sister is coming from Little Rock on Wednesday to stay for a week, bringing her two year old Tasmanian devil with her, which reminds me that I have to devil-proof my family room because Carlie has markers and crayons and other non-2-yro-friendly things EVERYWHERE. There is a little bit of Carlie-ness in every nook and cranny of this house, and 90% of it is not toddler friendly. I also need to find and eradicate the source of the stench before she gets here.

And we’ve got our big family campout next weekend, which would definitely be hindered by a sick kid. Campout head count current is at 16 adults, 5 teens and 13 kids. We’re hosting on our riverfront property near the coast (if you consider 15 miles to be near, which I do not, but to my husband that’s practically the beach, plus who needs the ocean when you have a river (Me! Me! That’s who!) ) This is our fourth annual “big campout” which has been at different times dubbed “O’B Fest,” “Little Tijuana” and currently the name of choice is “Dignity Village.”

I’ve had three calls in the last two days from people wanting to discuss menus and coordinate food, etc. I don’t want to be in charge of food, or coordinating or anything else. I just want to go camping and keep it simple and not try to feed 30+ people in any kind of organized fashion. But people are going to want to eat and so I guess it’s time to put a little thought into it. The only plan so far is that we’re getting a couple sacks of oysters in Astoria and grilling those for dinner Saturday night. As far as Thursday, Friday, Sunday and Monday food goes, it’s all still up in the air. But, oysters, yum. Anyone who knows how to feed large groups on a campout that wants to join us, drop me a line! It’s going to be a good time, food or no food, that much is for sure.

So, obviously, I have no time for illness in my household. Not to mention, school starts in nine days (can I get an amen!) and she can’t be sick for the excitement of back to school. Especially not this year, with the whole drama of having “the new teacher” that no one has met yet. How exciting is that when you go to a VERY SMALL school that has had the same teachers for 100 years? Very exciting, that’s how exciting.

Well, 9:20 a.m. on a Sunday morning. I guess I should get out of bed and see what’s doing with the rest of the fam. Plus I need to find an Advil for my head. Sangria, yum.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Where's the Poop... kind of like Where's Waldo but stinkier

Now Tim is also obsessed with "the smell" and finding the origin of "the smell." It was suggested that just because it smells like poop, maybe it's actually cat pee. So we just rolled up the rug and put it outside. Guess what? Living room still reeks.

Anyone want a cat?

Saturday, August 9, 2008

cozy

Movie night essentials: camping chair, sleeping bag and chocolate.