Monday, March 16, 2009

I am not making any of this up


I'm sitting at a red light on a one-way street. I'm about the third car back from the intersection. A cop car is behind me. A blue pickup truck is coming toward us GOING THE WRONG WAY DOWN A ONE-WAY STREET. Not barreling towards us in a scary way, but going slowly in an Oh Shit This Is The Wrong Way! kind of way.


Then? The blue truck? Turns off of the one-way street, and is now going THE WRONG WAY on ANOTHER ONE-WAY street. Seriously.


I look at the cop in my rearview mirror, and she is talking on her radio. And I think, IT'S ABOUT FREAKING TIME that there's actually a cop around when this kind of shit happens. Because stupid people, when it's not me being stupid, always seem to get away with it.


The cop puts her lights on behind me, so I pull into a parking lot (no shoulder), because I want to get out of her way as quickly as possible so she can go after the pickup truck.


But the cop? Pulls into the parking lot behind me and gets out of her car. AND WRITES ME A GODDAMN $216 TICKET FOR EXPIRED TAGS.


The car is registered in Tim's name, so any kind of registration or whatever comes to him. So it is not surprising to have expired tags. BUT SERIOUSLY? YOU ARE WRITING ME A TICKET WHILE A TRUCK DRIVES AWAY GOING THE WRONG WAY DOWN A ONE-WAY STREET? Seriously? I cannot wrap my brain around this.


And I say to the cop, I thought I was getting out of your way so you could go after the truck going the wrong way. And she says to me, and I quote, "I didn't see no truck going nowhere."


I swear to God, I am going to take a valium and have a glass of wine right now, at 12:58 p.m., and try to calm my ass down before Carlie gets home at 3:30, because? I am losing my shit over this.