Thursday, November 12, 2009

Midweek Monday

While the extra little holiday yesterday was nice, the end result was that today, Thursday, was more like a Monday morning. Not. So. Nice.

Carlie hasn't been to school since Friday. Her teacher sent home her assignments Monday and Tuesday. This morning, she had a huge melt down over an assignment that was due today which she did not complete because she (a) forgot about it and (b) didn't have the book. It is in her desk. At school. Where she hasn't been since Friday.

She went ballistic and had a two-year-old sobbing tantrum. Seriously. At age 10 years 11 months.

Question to the moms: how much do you micromanage your child's school work? She had her books, she had papers, I said "Do your homework before you have anymore computer time." I saw her at the table with books and papers. Later, I saw her on the computer and I said, "Did you get your work done?" She said yes. I felt my parental duty was done.

This is not the first time that she "forgot" about an assignment, watched DVDs and played around on the computer instead, and then remembered her assignment in the morning.

I have a friend with a child Carlie's age who is ON TOP OF her child's assignments. Seriously. She knows every paper due, every report, the date of every test. I do not know these things. I ask Carlie if she has homework when we get home, and believe her when she says yes or no. If she needs help, she asks me for help. Otherwise, she does her thing and I leave her to it. Am I being too lax? I mean, seriously, isn't fifth grade old enough to manage your own shit?

ANYWAY.... I took her to school, a sobbing wreck of a girl, wearing a sweatshirt out of the dirty hamper, hair that had been shampooed but not brushed, unmatched socks, red splotchy face and still actively sobbing.

At this point, she is no longer crying about the horror of the forgotten assignment. Now she's crying because she doesn't want to go into her classroom looking like a crying freak.

As we're walking thru the halls, I start talking to someone, and I'm kind of gesticulating, as I am prone to do, and I stabbed Carlie in the forehead with my car keys. STABBED HER IN THE FOREHEAD WITH MY KEYS. As in a little dot of blood is now forming on the girl's forehead. This child seriously could not get a break this morning.

The last thing we need around here is two Mondays per week.


Tiffany said...

I kept Sean home from school today citing his asthma. In actuality, Tad accidentally kicked in him the face last night doing some kind of twirling ninja move and Sean has a swollen, cut nose and two black eyes. I don't need the visit from CPS. I'm a wimpy mom!

Also, having two "Mondays" in one week totally sucks.

And Tad can't get his shit together, and he's 13. No, some kids are just born organized and others are nagged into it. Mine suffer from "neither" and so I get calls and emails from Tad's teachers about his missing assignments regularly.

Also, this comment has no point whatsoever.

Jen on the Edge said...

For me, it depends on the child. One child I don't have to follow up with, but the other one I do. As Tiffany said, some kids just can't get their shit together.

Erin said...

I took Tuesday off, and Wednesday was such a huge bummer. It was worth it, but only barely.

Anna See said...

Yikes. Talk about adding insult to injury.

J is on top of his assignments. He'll say, "I'm fine, I don't need to study." and he's generally right. That said, he forgot his Barbarian mask that he made last night. The teacher had him make a new one, which her messed up, crumpled up, and promptly threw in the trash with much drama.

M has been home all week. Tomorrow will be both her Monday and Friday. No word from school about ANY makeup work. I'm nervous.

Lisa Wheeler Milton said...

Two Mondays a week is completely unacceptable, especially if you didn't get to touch Augusten.

You're a great mother, Shana. Even while gesticulating.

Keetha said...

Is it wrong that this made me laugh? I'm sorry, really I am.

My child is in the 2nd grade and I look through his folder and call out spelling words. I imagine when he's in the 5th grade, I will be looking to him to be more responsible abto keep up with his stuff. I hope.

DietBuddy said...

My son is 12 and in 7th grade. Since 6th grade, he's had a planner provided by the school to track assignments. He also had massive meltdowns the first year of middle school. I just go over his planner every now and then with him and he works ahead in the hardest classes (math). I think just having some sort of small organizer might help her out. We all have those days! You're doing a great job!

chacha said...

My parents did not micromanage and I was a space cadet up until the 5th grade. Meaning, I would forget I had a test the next day, not pay attention in class, etc. I got b's (sometimes c's, though math was always an A) simply by paying attention *sometimes*, and flying by the seat of my pants for tests and such. Then something flipped in my head and I started getting my shit together in the 5th grade. I think that's when my competitiveness came into play and I wanted to be #1 in my class or come as close to it as possible. Good 'ol ego.

So, maybe one day the switch will flip for Carlie.

stephanie (bad mom) said...

I am an actual paid teacher and I do not micromanage my kids' schoolwork - I do exactly what you do, ask & believe. When they fib or "forget" the natural consequence is their own anxiety & sadness, plus the added consequence of giving up all friend & electronic time as penance until I feel trusting again.

And I've actually created a nearly black eye with my gesticulating so don't feel bad...

Anonymous said...

Do you have copy writer for so good articles? If so please give me contacts, because this really rocks! :)