Monday, February 16, 2009

Stress is eating my brain... send oven mitts, quick

This is an oven mitt. Apparently I do not believe in oven mitts.

When I get stressed, I get stupid. Real stupid. I am by nature a not-stupid person. But once the old stress-o-meter gets pegged to 100%, I lose the ability to think straight. For example, during a particularly stressful episode a while back, I ran into my carport. With my car. The SAME carport that I have parked the SAME car in EVERY DAY for 10 years. My car didn't get bigger, the carport didn't move. Yet I? Ran the hell right into the pole, and good.

And while I don't get all stressed out very often, I do when I am traveling. And have I mentioned that I am LEAVING on WEDNESDAY for a trip to visit my DAD, who is DYING? Yeah, no stress there. Oh, and happy effing birthday to me as I turn 43, which is seriously OLDER THAN MIDDLE AGE because what are the chances of me living past, say, about 80? So, yeah, I'll admit that I am a bit stressed out this week.

Case in point: I made a great dinner tonight. Turkey breast, mashed potatoes, steamed asparagus and crescent rolls. And when it was time to take the crescent rolls out of the oven. I tore a paper towel off of the roll, folded it in half, opened the oven and attempted to remove the 375 degree pan WITH A FOLDED OVER PAPER TOWEL.

Wish me luck that I manage to brush my teeth and go to bed early tonight without doing bodily harm to myself or anyone else.


Cat said...

You are not middle age! If you are middle age then I'm way middle age, so you are young and youthful.

Anna See said...

Oh my goodness. Get yourelf to bed right now!

I know what you mean about stress. I trip, I fall, I curse, I forget things. Stress is dangerous.

Happy Birthday? :)

katydidnot said...

oh, yeah, i don't do oven mitts either. i just fold up a tea towel. or a dish towel. not very often a paper towel, which, as you know, doesn't work as well.

Rogue Scholar said...

Oh yes... i've been known to reach in with my bare hand. DUH!! That doesn't work well either.

Keetha said...

The funniest part of that is that you carefully folded the paper towel in half first.

I mean, I hope you're okay and all. :-)

And also, what's the big day? The birthday?

Fantastic Forrest said...

Happy Birthday! Middle age is always 10 years older than you are. Please remember this. Because? I am older than you. And fuck that if you think I'm middle aged.

Don't get stressed about going to see your Dad, because you get to see your Dad! I know he is dying. And that is sad. But it would be sadder if you didn't get to see him. I speak from the perspective of having watched my Dad die of lung cancer. And having been stressed about it. Force yourself to relax and treasure the time with your Dad. You will be really glad you did. Because you, Shana, will have many more decades of enjoying life, and will look back on that time with gratitude.

Safe travels, enjoy the time back in New Orleans, and remember your oven mitts!

Much love,

Lisa Wheeler Milton said...

Oh weary woman, rest assured we have all done crazy stuff while we are stressed.

Please take care, and enjoy your trip.


HB said...

Totally love the advice from Fantastic Forest - enjoy the daddio time & introducing Carley to NO. Birthdays are good to have! And, at least you aren't running 13.1 miles on snow possibly...

Prefers Her Fantasy Life said...

You're not middle-aged until you die your hair blue and wear Dr. Scholl's shoes.