Wall of Fire = Freedom

Do you think the Big Finish is really all that big? No?
How about now that I've put it in context with an assist from my favorite barista?

You would think with a Big Finish like this, you really couldn't celebrate 4th of July any more vigorously, right? But you'd be oh so wrong. Because? Wall of Fire.

So remember the neighbors I mentioned, the ones who are bat shit crazy with the fireworks? Yeah, they erected this little structure yesterday in their front yard. You know, the front yard directly across the street from my front yard. Sweet! It would be more adequately called the Wall of OMFG Noise, because what they did was string yards and yards of firecrackers on it and let them go off for, like, hours on end.

It was very dark out when I took this photo, so I had to get right up on the Wall of Fire to get a photo that was lit well enough by the flash to actually read it. So you lose the whole effect of the fact that this is a 7 foot tall arch over their sidewalk. To put it into context, it's tall enough to walk under...

My next door neighbor had his annual 4th of July BBQ, which is huge -- we're talking about 100 people in his house, front yard, back yard and in the street. He buys a truckload of fireworks and basically let's the kids at the party have their way with them.

Once it got dark, everyone was in the front yard on the lawn and in the street watching the fireworks, complete with requisite "ooohs" and "ahhhhhs," when a little old lady from down the street started wandering over to the bat shit crazy neighbor's yard to watch the fireworks from a little further distance away. She was heading straight for the Wall of Fire, going to walk under it, with lit firecrackers dangling from that sucker! She was completely oblivious and everyone across the street at the party is SCREAMING "Don't walk under the Wall of Fire! Stay away from the Wall of Fire!" and then someone finally got up and sprinted across the street, grabbed her and steered her away from walking under the more adequately named Arch of Hell. Right as they reached her and backed her up, the firecrackers started exploding and nearly scared her to death. Good times in the 'hood people, good times.

While I mock the Wall of Fire in all of its ghetto-fabulous glory, it was the highlight of my 4th of July. Or more accurately, the highlight was when the first ginormous never-ending strand of firecrackers was lit up on the Wall of Fire and a hearty partygoer from our side of the street yelled out in a booming voice WALL OF FIRE, BABY! FREEEEEEEDOM!

God Bless America.